FEARS.

1.16.2013

Soo long time no talk huh? Let's see the past couple of months have been crazy for all of us girls and I'll be the first to admit it. I just recently got married and with that happening meant I took all of the attention from my sisters so they could help me with my wedding, whom I am so grateful for. But this is besides the point for this post, maybe. Maybe it is relevant that is up to you to decide.



I have a confession to make, to most people I seem like a pretty confident person doing my own thing and living life. But I have to admit when it comes to school and my dream of becoming a Physical Therapist, I get scared out of my whits. My poor husband probably didn't know what he was getting himself into when I go tell him about all of my dreams and how it is a love-hate relationship between my dreams of becoming a Physical Therapist wondering if I will be able to accomplish this far out dream.



For the past couple of weeks I have had more and more time to think about life and really what I want to come out of it. No big deal, right?... It's a huge deal, because the thought of Physical Therapy pops into my head and for once in my life I feel inadequate and wonder how can I be ready to help heal peoples bodies through exercise? I went to a health fair today with big companies letting out all their secrets to me on how to succeed in "their business world". I was distraught at the thought that most of these big health care businesses were people who had majored in Business. Business is not what I want to hear about right now, I want to hear about Physical Therapy. Exercise Physiology. Something related to me. I want to get my foot into the door but have no idea how and where to start. Sure I'm just a junior in college and the only experience I will be able to get is volunteer work, but hey its a start and I will gladly take it into the palm of my hands.



The point of this is I have been afraid for the past year and a half to pick up my cell phone, dial a number to a Physical Therapist office and get my name out there. I have been afraid that maybe I am not on top of my game with Anatomy, Medicine, and Chemistry.

It goes beyond this, I have been afraid of Chemistry in school.  Afraid of snowboarding fast and on my heels. (I snowboard backwards and on my toes, weird I know) Afraid of talking to new neighbors. Afraid of talking to some of my best friends from high school. Afraid to let go. Afraid to start something new. Afraid of what I truly can become through hard work and determination.

There was one thing I didn't let fear get in the way and that was marrying my best friend. Yes, we are young, in college, and still trying to figure our lives out but we are doing it together and it is through him I have found strength and should give a lot of thanks to helping me get over some of these fears.

I heard a quote from someone one time "Do something every day that scares you." I am kind of at that point where, I am done being afraid. I really feel like sometimes you get so done with being afraid and have to realize this is your life...go out there and show everybody what you're all about. This is your life. 

More importantly prove it to yourself. Prove to yourself you can overcome all those things that scare you. 
It can be little things like I am afraid to cook, smile at a stranger, afraid to love, afraid to jump into something new. Afraid to go see a part of the world that is different than anything you are used to. Afraid to pour your heart and soul into your passions and professions. Afraid to talk to someone in your family that have hurt you. Afraid to move on. Afraid to talk to that person you like. Or Afraid to ask a professor what you got wrong on a test. These things aren't so little but begin to define who we are.  

I'm done being afraid. No more excuses of that I am not qualified enough. I want to conquer Physical Therapy. 

Make a goal right now. Do something that scares you once a week and get it done. We can't let fear rule our lives any longer. 

What are your fears? What do you want to conquer?
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